I’m writing this mostly for me. So if you are, like me, an expert in self-sabotage: this article is also for you.

Let’s say, like me, you have a deadline, and you act like you have all the time in the world. Or maybe you have a dream of being an entrepreneur in the digital age and take no concrete step to make your dream come true. Maybe you do, but then the step gets complicated, and it’s not so straightforward and oh look! Your phone just buzzed, and then you open YouTube and you think to yourself “Eh, I have time I’ll do it later”.

And then 48 minutes have slipped you by and those 48 minutes turn into 2 hours of you doing nothing. You might be thinking, how does she know that? No, I’m not psychic. Turns out, you and I, we’re not so special. Maybe you have a different procrastination protocol. Maybe it’s not YouTube for you, maybe it’s 20-min episodes on Netflix. I’m not sure what turns you away from the work you need to be doing, but whatever it is, I know what you’re choosing instead.

It all boils down to choice. If we’re being honest with ourselves before we procrastinate, we objectively have two choices : The Work™, or The Procrastination. We can hardly fix something unless we know its origin, right? Now, there are many and multiple reasons for procrastination. It could be perfectionism, or a daunting huge task, a lot of tasks that need doing, or even a multitude of things you want to do with no idea where to start? But it’s fear. All of these different reasons could be said to fall under the umbrella of fear. You want your project to be perfect, and you’re afraid it won’t be so you avoid it. The task you have to complete is gigantic, and it’s fear of the effort it requires that makes you turn the other way. The same goes for when you have a lot of things to do, it’s the fear of the time and effort they require. And when you don’t know which thing you want to do first, you’re afraid of prioritizing one thing and choosing wrong. But it’s all fear. Whenever we’re procrastinating, we’re choosing fear over The Work™.

Conquering fear is one of life’s greatest adventures. Making your dreams come true will ask it of you. No one starts a creative or business venture without battling with fear first. It’s a step you can’t avoid because fear is the enemy of success. Does that mean you’ll always be afraid? No. Hell, no.

There are simple and practical ways to conquer your fears, whatever they may be. And if you do apply yourself, the benefits will not be limited to your dreams and ventures. It’s your entire life that will profit from your newfound superpower.

What does it mean?

Most people value and choose security over fulfilment. Comfort over courage. You cannot be like most people. They will choose to stay in jobs they hate that pay the bills but kill their souls, living in marriages long-dead because it’s easier, and die with chests full of regret.

Think of fear as junk food and courage as healthy food. Some people will eat junk food until it ravages their bodies, but some people treat their bodies as holy and only choose healthy diets with lots of protein and fiber. Be like them. Choose courage over fear. Refuse to let fear take control of you, look at it for the greasy disgusting food it is, and view courage as a nutritionist views salmon. Every time you procrastinate, you choose fear. Just once, next time, choose differently. Choose courage.

When it comes to psychology, battling a nameless entity is like fighting in the dark: you can throw punches, but you don’t know if they’ll land. Find a quiet place and get real for five minutes. What do you truly fear?

Write it down and be specific. Don’t go for “Afraid of failing” that’s a given. Try making it both personal and true: “Disappointing dad” is more like it.

You don’t even have to clear your mind, unfurl it all on those pages. Write down every last worry that keeps you up at night and away from your work. And leave a space between every fear. When you’re done, read the whole list. You’ll laugh at some of the things you write because a lot of fear is irrational. Those that are, you should cross them in red. For those that aren’t, read step 3.

Some fears are justified, they are there to keep you safe. To conquer fear is not to be some post-human being that never ever feels fear. It’s about learning what a rational vs an irrational fear is. In other words, carefulness.

So when you write down a rational fear, say “I’m afraid of not being able to support me and my family if I leave my job to freelance now”. That is a rational fear, but the most accurate question is, what can you do about it? So much of the world is not up to us, so what’s within your control?

What can you do now, to make sure that fear does not come true?

A possible answer would be “Stay in my job until I make a sufficient living freelancing” or if you saved enough money “Use my savings”. Whatever answer fits your life best, that’s what you will write down under that fear. It’s a valuable exercise in reminding you that when facing your fears, you can be afraid, or you can choose to think of what you can do about it. Or in other words, choose to remember you are not powerless to your fears.

You might be confused by this, but this is the best part. See, there is almost no physiological difference between fear and excitement. What that actually means, is that you can choose to be excited about things that scare you. It sounds crazy, I know, but I’ve tried it in my own life. Before exams, or having a difficult conversation or being evaluated, and it works like a charm every time. Your body does not know the difference between excitement and fear so it will interpret the physiological stimuli the way your brain chooses to react to them.

So, if you say out loud: “I’m so excited about starting this project. I’ve been looking forward to it, this is really exciting”

Choosing to be excited and telling yourself how excited you are, and focusing on those words and the feeling they arise, changes your body’s interpretation from fear to excitement. It is honestly life-changing. And it works whether it’s a first date, asking for a promotion, or starting a big project. You can choose to make yourself excited about anything and your body will believe it, then your mind will follow and your actions will reflect it. Something quite magical happens after, you actually become excited. And when you are excited about something, results can’t help but follow.